More communication problems

Susie and I texted about plans for tomorrow.  I wasn't clear about a couple of things from her texts so I asked her about it.  She got frustrated and short with me when she was explaining the details.  She also said that it is frustrating to her that she has to plan everything for the kids.  

I hate to say it but if I wasn't for the kids I think I would be outta here.  I mean, just to have my own space and not deal with the feelings of annoyance I sense from Susie would be worth a different situation.  But, that isn't my reality at this time.  We have kids and we have to stay together for them.  It is a sacrifice because there is no joy or happiness in our relationship at this time.  I keep trying to sense my feelings of affection for Susie but they really aren't there.  There is sexual attraction.  There is much respect and admiration.  There is appreciation.  But I don't feel a sense of attraction to her personality and desire time and conversation with her.  That seems more like a burden.  Maybe I'm stuffing these feelings.  Probably am.  But I can't help to think that this is a reaction to her ill feelings toward me.  

I didn't want to meet with Scott again because of the money.  But I need to meet with Scott again for my own emotional health.  

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