A PIvotal Moment in Our Marriage - September 11, 2021

Tonight, Saturday, September 11, Susie told me that she no longer has feelings for me.  

It's hard to look at those words now that they are typed.  I'm a bit in denial and shock.  Yet, at the same time it is a relief to finally know what the hell has been going on in our relationship.  

However, is this moment all on her?  Or am I really the responsible one here.  

I think I've been the one digging into the problem.  But it has been my lack of understanding and empanthy that has led us here.  Susie needs a strong leader in this relationship and I just don't know if I could every provide that in our marriage.  I don't think I've done anything to help her emotionally through the journey, the wild journey, we've been on for the last 20 years.  Especially the last 16 years.  Since Ruthie's birth.

It's going to be different around here.  

Help me God, to deal with this.  In the process help me become a more healthy and whole and faithful person.  

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